i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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