ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
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