just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Randomize