You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
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