Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
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