? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
