Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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