If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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