The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
Randomize
