roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Randomize
