You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Randomize
