there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
