I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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