idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
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