Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
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