Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Verdict: uncircumcised.
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