so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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