i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
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