better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
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