I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Randomize