There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
