I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
