Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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