doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
