the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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