i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
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