and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Randomize
