wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
