She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
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