I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
we're making bets on your personal life
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
