Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
