You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
Randomize
