VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
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