It's like God shit irony all over that family
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
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The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
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What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
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