Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
True but thats because hes a fetus.
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
You've changed since you got that strap on
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
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