Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
