So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
