So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
