tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Randomize
