I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
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