i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Randomize
