you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
I have tasted many bathrooms
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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