What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
