she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
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