she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
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