allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize
