Yo dont text me then not text me
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
