like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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