Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
We left an ass print on the piano.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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