um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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