the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
how do flat chested girls get laid?
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Randomize
